♥ Friday, May 05, 2006
Haven been faithful towards blogging through the whole weeks. This I apologize. Been really stressful and moody the whole week.The work load is really heavy and time consuming. And to survive, I have to really draw well so as to compete with the rest. Unlike the others in the class, I just dont have the art foundation or even the basics. So totally demoralized when I see the works of others. When I'm dont feel like talking, its just because I hate expressing my thoughts out to others, not even my mom. I write it all down. When I dont speak up, it doesnt mean I dont know whats going on around me either.To My dearest Life long friends,Yes I really missed you guys very much! Long so much for your presence with mine, out for dinner sometimes okay? Gimme a ring to keep confirming!To My Wifey,Sorry my love, didnt know whats really going on in your relationship, been reading your blog and getting worried for you at the same time. Do hope everything will turn out as well as you expect it to be ya? Love you loads! and take care! PLS sam, Not only jayme and chingtong yar, you have us as well ((: Darling, I missed you sooo much! Fuzzy, Xin XIn and Chacha as well ((: muacks! love your brows now btw~ NICE.To JingRu,Hey hey girl, you are NOT outcasted okay? DMD06 loves you and you know I do too! we dont want you to be outcasted too thats why we always plan to do everything together ((: guys girls rojak ((: ahahas. The world doesnt revolve around you, you gotta move along too(: WITH US.Girl, YOU KNOW I CARE OKAY.To Eugene, DICKY and Ah Beng,Guys, thanks for always being there for me to punch pinch and irritate (: Sorry I didnt mean to raise my voice in the lab, just that I was just so morally depressed thanks to someone called the alex lecturer. Just stressed up and vexed because I really do feel that I'm such in a dead shit cos I cant draw. So noob. Sorry guys, I really appreciate all your motivations and preachings (: Im really touched. Very.To May,THANK YOU SO MUCH MY DEAREST! EVERYTHING! you really moved me greatly with your words. Gawd. I actually cried (again!). Chessy...yesyes.I hated this course but I really love you people! all our classmates ((: Really Nice, ALL.I will NOT1# keep ordering BEEF and enjoy it in front of you. cos you cant eat it.2# keep having cheese in my mouth, cos you are allergic to it.3# keep removing all the salt from the fries in front of you. just cos you love salt.MAY, YOU ARE TRUELY AMAZING.To Jia Zhi my One and Only,Hey my boy, I missed you like crazy, haven seen you for 166 hours and when I finally see you, I was on a verge of crying just cos I had a really really bad and rotten day. Totally lousy feelings and I just didnt like to talk about it. I have to say that I did cried when you said you got the timing wrong, but dear, I dont hold it against you. Im happy enough that you are here for and with me (:I do appreciate your sweetness and all the things you've done for me (including that love letter you snuck under my pillow.), so glad you are here with me. Sorry to ruin your perfect day alright? Today is just ...not my day.I STILL LOVE YOU.TONS.It scares me to see how wonderful art can be in my classmates' sketchbooks.It scares me to see how mine is like no where like theirs'...It scares me to understand how much they have in ART education and skills before this course.It scares me to identify such huge difference I have from theirs and how much I really need to improve.the problem is...HOW.That fucking short fat lecturer actually critisized me for my ugly piece of shit.LOOK IM SORRY OKAY? IM NOT LIKE THE OTHERS. IM NOT TAUGHT TO DRAW.I was like so demoralized when he said HOW much I can improve on it and he purposely made it clear in class to everyone that how much our art work have to improve and mould so in order to find more job varieties and chances in the media industry. Art work like mine can only bring me to my own home working as a part time maid. I didnt talk much the whole day (exclude the 2hour lecture where I fell asleep the whole way through.), Dickson was really nice, he tried to cheer me up with some funny and astonishing clips, Eugene added loads of crap, and Beng when around to poof me. Im really upset with myself. When I shot back at you guys, I didnt mean it. Im just frustrated, not mad at anyone yar. And thanks, really. Im deeply thank you all for your concerns and encouragements.-will I make it Out there when I am standing here in Nowhere-Im suffering here.
Blogged @ Friday, May 05, 2006
